Before I begin, any nigga still playing a PS3/Xbox 360 needs to move the cursor up to the top right, click X, and evacuate from these premises ASAP. These wavy paragraphs are not designed to be read by the eyes of you niggas that joyfully look at PS3/Xbox 360 graphics in the year 2016.
FIRST OF ALL, I want to thank Ash Nasty for keeping the statistics for incarcerated black men low, b. I truly believe if she didn’t comfort this nigga with her vanilla yams and tender high credit score voice late at night, he’d be making a grill cheese sandwich with an iron inside a Louisiana maximum security prison. No doubt, he would’ve murdered one of these Home Alone face kids who pedal their big wheels into his chat room on a daily. Reminding him, that there’s no shooting badge in 2K that can help you hit a jumper from behind his hairline.
Now that we’ve got that out the way, lets move along…
SON! am I reading thi…HOLD UP WRONG PIC YO
SON! am I reading this right? This can’t be legit. I did my Googles on 3 different Wi-Fi networks to make sure this shit I stumbled upon wasn’t filling my head with deceitful information.
1 Million+ YouTube subscribers
450K+ Twitch Followers
200K+ Twitter Followers
HOLY SMOKES! I can’t even lie, when I first took a gander at his pic, I thought this was just Draymond Green disguising himself as a gamer, b. That was the only explanation I can think of for these internet breaking numbers. Boy ol boy was I wrong. Maybe if I didn’t sit through a 17 minute Kanye West rant, i’d be thinking clearly.
I spoke to survivors who escaped from the Cash concentration camps. They’ve made me very aware of the ear raping crimes being commited on his property. Come to find out, Cash Castro hails from the mean streets of Louisiana. The same state as rappers, Mystikal, Lil Boosie and Master P. It makes perfect sense now. You know what all these legends have in common? DO YOU? They are all LOUD AS FUCK. So, this explains why he was born with subwoofers installed in his mouth. It’s a rare thing shared at birth amongst niggas in his state.
Below is a rare photo of legendary streamer Cash Nasty at an undisclosed location getting the subwoofer speakers in his mouth repaired after blowing them out from a long night of raging.
WARNING: If you’ve never been to CashNastyGaming’s stream, I strongly suggest you listen to Meek Mill’s music about 30-45 mins before you even step foot inside the Cash Nasty stadium. Look at it as a pre workout. Because you gotta warm your ears up for the main event. Your hearing organs gotta be in great shape because they’ll be lifting a heavy set of syllables dropped on them from the Twitch Godfather himself, Grand Master Cash.
Before I even logged into my Twitch account I could hear his voice THUNDERING from 6 websites away. As I sat on NBA.com I became disturbed by all the commotion down them dot com roads. So, I exited the NBA tab, threw on my DDoS proof vest and took a journey to the endangered Twitch islands.
dog…DOG, A MILLISECOND after I typed “What’s good Cash!?!” in chat, my screen name was IMMEDIATELY washed away into a sea of Cash emojis. My warm greeting to Cash Corleone just ended up being a unrecognized gesture sinking to the bottom of the Pacific Nasty ocean.
Despite me becoming non existent in his stream at Guinness World Record speeds. The Cash Nasty show was indeed on a higher echelon of entertainment, b. Anybody in the audience who threw a tomato on stage while Cash Daddy Combs was performing, will be barked at by the top dog himself and quickly dragged feet first by The Nasty Crew into a dark corner for 600 isolated seconds.
“So, how good is Cash Escobar at video games?” I personally think he’s decent. If you can overlook his uncontrollable anger, you’ll catch a glimpse of him giving niggas the work left & right, PAUSE.
The discord is usually jam-packed with 2 different types of vocal struggles. If it’s not a little rascal who sounds like his adam’s apple is still going through ripening stages it’s most certainly a dirty nigga on parole with a soundcloud rapper voice.
RANDOM THOUGHT: Cash must got the 2K Gatorade Perform Pack glowing under his chair because he rages for over 2 hours with unlimited energy, b. It’s an amazing thing to witness.
Despite everything I said, I gotta put RESPEK ON HIS NAME. One thing we have in common is that we both DON’T GIVE A FUCK. This is a very important trait to have pumping through your veins especially if you’re a Twitch streamer.
In my nobody cares opinion, Cashius Clay has dope content. He does mad giveaways, 1 v 1’s fans in IRL and provides grade A GSW slander. I would tell the viewers who read this to follow all of his platforms BUT you seen his numbers. That would be like telling niggas to go paypal some money to Floyd Mayweather. KAPPA
Aight, time to clock out. I’m outta here y’all.
Oh and one more thing…
Don’t worry about why I wrote this, worry about why your aunt wants me to spot her at the gym while she bench presses 280 lbs.
Pric…Ahhhhhhh NOBODY CARES B